The Letter From Dad (英文版翻譯：小姬)
I never received a letter from you. Except once, when I was a soldier in Hwa-Lan, the Private gave me a letter signed with calligraphy, it was from you.
You were not well educated, the only education you received was from the Japanese occupation, you learned basic Japanese for the tourists from Japan.
When I opened the letter, it was written in delicate calligraphy. You had beautiful calligraphy. When you were still healthy, I enjoyed the banners you crafted for the Chinese New Year. I also enjoyed helping you to make the ink for your work. All my siblings got some of your art talents, but only me, tiny little me, got the chance to study at the expensive art school.
In the letter you told me to follow orders, and do be a good man. I recalled that when I was a rebellious teenager, I saw you as an insult. I was ashamed to tell people your occupation, and never invited friends to our home. You never blamed me for my ignorance, what you did, was write this sincere letter to your boy.
I blamed myself every time I recalled that I was not a good son.
I had some money right before I was discharged from the army, I wandered around the streets of Hwa-Lan and bought a pair of rings for you and Mom, I thought it was a big deal. I remembered that you just took them from my hand, without a word.
After that, the financial situation in our home was getting worse, I considered what little me could do for the family.
A Buddhist mantra says: “one person entering monastery, it is a blessing for all of one’s family.” As naïve as I was, I thought this was probably the only thing I could do for my family.
I went to a Buddhist temple and became a monk without your consent, while you were having dialysis, I didn’t know how much you worried about me. I prayed for you and Mom everyday and thought that I was being a really good son.
I remembered, in your last 23 days, you woke up and yelled at me: “What kind of good son doesn’t stay by my side?”
I had no words.
That night, I stayed with you alone, you looked so fragile and helpless in the hospital. Your coughing awoke me, I stood by your bed and looked at you, I didn’t know how long it took, finally, I had the courage to give you a hug, and couldn’t stop myself from crying until your clothes were soaked with my tears. After that, I helped you to change into clean clothes.
I still remember everything of those moments. In Spiderman, when Peter Parker holds his dying uncle, it just looked like the day I watched you die; I saw you again in Finding Nemo, when the fish was frantic to find his son. I sat in the theater and cried out loud, no one knew what happened to me.
I couldn’t sleep again last night, Dad, I miss you…so much……!